4 Things I Learned from Living and Studying Abroad

And, finally, to round things off are the things that I learned while I was studying abroad. These are less relating to Japan specifically and more to do with the experience as a whole, but I’m sure anyone who has studied or will study abroad might be interested to read them!

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4 Things I Miss About Japan

Fear not, friends! Not everything about living in Japan was all doom and gloom; quite the contrary. It’s an amazing, really unique country filled with wonderful people and places and things, and in spite of the things that annoyed me during my stay, my heart is still full of wonderful memories that I’ll carry forever.

So, here are four things that I miss about Japan.

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4 Things I Don’t Miss About Japan

Living in Japan was a great experience, but as people who have followed me since I left to live there will know, I do not like everything about it. That doesn’t mean that I don’t still love Japan and that I didn’t enjoy my time there, just that there were certain things that annoyed the crap out of me, or problems that I personally couldn’t make myself ignore.

It should go without saying, but everything that follows is just my own personal opinions and experiences. I make some generalisations, but recognise that they are generalisations; I don’t mean to invalidate anyone else’s alternative experiences of Japan and I also don’t mean to frighten anyone away from studying there! These are just things that bug me (they might not bother other former gaijin at all), from my point of view, and while some might be indicative of wider problems that might affect a lot of other people, please don’t take them to mean that Japan is awful and you should rethink going, because it’s really not! Studying in any country will always have its downsides.

Anywho, here we are: four things I still don’t miss about Japan. Be warned, it’s long!

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It’s been quite a while now since I arrived home from Japan - about five months in fact, yikes - and I’ve neglected to post due to a variety of reasons (personal, short attention span, being busy to name a few).

In the spirit of rounding off my experiences properly, I’m finally going to post what I mentioned ages back: posts about my most and least missed things about Japan, and one about things I learned from my experience studying abroad. After that, I don’t really intend to use this blog all that much any more as I don’t have much to blog about with regards to Japan, but anyone who wants to is welcome to follow me on my personal blog. I’ll still leave this one up so that people can use the existing content as a resource if they’d like, but I won’t really be posting or answering questions here any more.

That said, keep an eye out for my next few posts! ♥


If you have an hour and a half to spare, take time to watch this film about foreigners living in Japan. It’s quite interesting. It really hit home on a few things.

Very accurate, in both the positive and negative discussions.

(via fuckyeahnativejapanese)

Being Gay in Japan

This has been shared by a few people I know, so I thought I’d share it with you guys, too.

The existence of things like yaoi and shounen-ai makes a lot of people who’re interested in Japan but have never visited think that it must be super positive about homosexuality, but actually, it’s quite the contrary.

Yes, I can use chopsticks: the everyday microaggressions that grind us down. →

Have you ever noticed how many interpersonal interactions in Japan are like “speed dates” of set questions?

For example, the taxi drivers who have the odd fascination about where you’re from, whether you’re married, how much you like Japan, and how hard you think the Japanese language is?

The barkeeps and clientele who try to slot you into their hackneyed preconceptions of some country and nationality, what you can and cannot eat, and (as things get drunker) how much you enjoy having physical liaisons with Japanese?

The neighbors who have a white-hot curiosity about how differently you raise your kids, what you fight with your spouse about, and how much you like Japan — regardless of how many years you’ve been interacting?

In the beginning, these were dismissible as just acts of awkward friendliness by people who didn’t know how else to approach you. It at least made you really good in certain areas of Japanese conversation.

But after years of repeat games, boredom sets in, and you begin to realize two things: 1) that you can sleepwalk through most conversations, and 2) that, if you stay awake, you see there is a larger issue at play here: social control — something increasingly recognized by social psychologists as “microaggressions.”

They include, in Japan’s case, verbal cues (such as “You speak such good Japanese!” — after saying only a sentence or two — or “How long will you be in Japan?” regardless of whether a non-Japanese (NJ) might have lived the preponderance of their life here), nonverbal cues (people espying NJ and clutching their purse more tightly, or leaving the only empty train seat next to them), or environmental cues (media caricatures of NJ with exaggerated noses or excessive skin coloration, McDonald’s “Mr. James” mascot (JBC, Sept. 1, 2009)).

Usually these are unconscious acts grounded in established discourses of interactions. Nobody “means” to make you feel alienated, different, out of place, or stereotyped.

But microaggressions are also subtle societal self-enforcement mechanisms to put people “in their place.” For NJ, that “place” is usually the submissive status of “visitor” or “guest,” with the Japanese questioner assuming the dominant position of “host” or “cultural representative of all Japan.”

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This article has been making the rounds around international students I know, and it’s pretty accurate as far as explaining the little things that make me tick as a foreigner in Japan goes. People too often dismiss Japan’s racism because the things that many Japanese people say or do aren’t necessarily done with bad intentions, but intent isn’t magical and doesn’t change the way it makes a lot of foreigners here feel. Sure, they might just all be ‘curious’, but when you’re made to feel out-of-place, day in and day out, however nice the people around you might be, it has the potential to eat away at you. It’s also something that a lot of people who’ve visited but never really lived in Japan often seem unable to fully understand.

(Of course, although I’m posting this because of it’s relevance to my study abroad, it’s also important to remember that these kinds of microaggressions are not something that can only be experienced in Japan - they happen every day to minority groups just about everywhere, to the same effect.)

On a lighter note, I’ve never understood why Japanese people are always so curious as to whether or not foreigners have romantic partners. (・_・;)